{"title":"Bumper Stickers","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWeatherproof. Unhinged. Dishwasher-safe.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eBumper stickers for people who feel things at a volume that concerns their loved ones. Die-cut and bumper sticker formats. $4 each. 6.66% of every order goes to The Satanic Temple.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"all-gas-no-breaks-lets-get-diagnosed-wooo","title":"ALL GAS NO BREAKS LET'S GET DIAGNOSED WOOO","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eFor the hyperfocused, the unmedicated, the newly-medicated, or anyone who has ever said \"wait, that's a symptom?\" at 2am while reading a Reddit thread. This is your sticker. You already knew that before you finished reading the title.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eWeatherproof matte vinyl. Dishwasher-safe, UV-resistant, won't fade in your back window through a Colorado summer. Hand-cut and packed by an actual person who thinks this is funny too. A portion of every order goes to The Satanic Temple.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Gas Station Sushi","offers":[{"title":"Bumper Sticker","offer_id":41690230816901,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Die-Cut","offer_id":41690230849669,"sku":null,"price":5.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0603\/0121\/3829\/files\/02-AllGasNoBreaks.png?v=1781322511"},{"product_id":"i-used-to-own-nilbog-net","title":"I used to own nilbog.net","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eYou had a domain. It mattered. Some things cannot be explained to people who weren't there. This sticker is for the ones who were there and whose eyes just went wide.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eWeatherproof matte vinyl. Dishwasher-safe, UV-resistant, won't fade in your back window through a Colorado summer. Hand-cut and packed by an actual person who thinks this is funny too. A portion of every order goes to The Satanic Temple.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Gas Station Sushi","offers":[{"title":"Bumper Sticker","offer_id":41690231767173,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Die-Cut","offer_id":41690231799941,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0603\/0121\/3829\/files\/09-nilbog.png?v=1781322482"},{"product_id":"please-be-patient-driver-is-stupid","title":"Please be patient, driver is stupid","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eA public service announcement. A cry for empathy. A preemptive apology. A deeply honest self-assessment displayed at 75 mph. We respect the transparency.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eWeatherproof. UV-resistant. Dishwasher-safe. Honesty is the best policy and also a great bumper sticker.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Gas Station Sushi","offers":[{"title":"Bumper Sticker","offer_id":41696443662469,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Die-Cut","offer_id":41696443695237,"sku":null,"price":5.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0603\/0121\/3829\/files\/11-driverisstupid.png?v=1781323070"},{"product_id":"if-youre-going-to-hit-me-make-sure-you-kill-me-💜","title":"If you're going to hit me, make sure you kill me 💜","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eFor the person who has stared down something genuinely difficult and came out the other side with a sense of humor about it. Not for shock value. For the people who get it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eYou know who you are. This one's for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eWeatherproof. UV-resistant. Dishwasher-safe. Worn best by survivors.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Gas Station Sushi","offers":[{"title":"Bumper Sticker","offer_id":41696444121221,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Die-Cut","offer_id":41696444153989,"sku":null,"price":5.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0603\/0121\/3829\/files\/ifyou_regonnahitme.png?v=1781322220"},{"product_id":"steve-asked-me-to-say-fuck-less","title":"Steve asked me to say \"Fuck\" less","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eSteve tried. Steve really tried. We appreciate Steve's effort. This sticker is a monument to Steve's hope and our complete indifference to it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eWeatherproof. UV-resistant. Dishwasher-safe. Steve has accepted this.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Gas Station Sushi","offers":[{"title":"Bumper Sticker","offer_id":41696444252293,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Die-Cast","offer_id":41696444285061,"sku":null,"price":5.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0603\/0121\/3829\/files\/steveaskedmetosayfuckless.png?v=1781331044"},{"product_id":"my-other-car-is-also-a-car","title":"My other car is also a car","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eNo fantasy. No aspiration. No punchline except the complete refusal to have one. This is a car. You have another car. It is also a car. This is the full statement and it stands.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eWeatherproof. UV-resistant. Dishwasher-safe. Factually accurate.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Gas Station Sushi","offers":[{"title":"Bumper Sticker","offer_id":41696444842117,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Die-Cut","offer_id":41696444874885,"sku":null,"price":5.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0603\/0121\/3829\/files\/17-myothercarisalsoacar_3367f3b7-7ac9-476a-98f5-88b634991017.png?v=1781322453"},{"product_id":"strong-scents-give-me-headaches","title":"Strong scents give me headaches","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eA boundary. A warning. A reasonable accommodation request displayed on a vehicle doing 70mph. Fragrance sensitivity is real and this sticker is the classiest way to tell the person next to you that their perfume is a problem.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eWeatherproof. UV-resistant. Dishwasher-safe. Low-scent household approved.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Gas Station Sushi","offers":[{"title":"Bumper Sticker","offer_id":41696444907653,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Die-Cut","offer_id":41696444940421,"sku":null,"price":5.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0603\/0121\/3829\/files\/18-strongscentsgivemeheadaches_d8e00bf9-3aec-433d-a77f-e65040f9f712.png?v=1781324258"},{"product_id":"emotional-support-girlfriend","title":"Emotional support girlfriend","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eShe's not decorative. She's load-bearing. She's the reason you made it to the appointment, sent the email, and ate a real meal this week. This sticker is for her and also for you for knowing what you have.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eWeatherproof. UV-resistant. Dishwasher-safe. She deserves this and more.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Gas Station Sushi","offers":[{"title":"Bumper Sticker","offer_id":41696446742661,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Die-Cut","offer_id":41696446775429,"sku":null,"price":5.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0603\/0121\/3829\/files\/27-EmotionalSupportGirlfriend.png?v=1781322544"},{"product_id":"air-bud-was-an-inside-job-1","title":"Air Bud Was An Inside Job","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe truth has been out there since 1997 and we're finally saying it out loud. Air Bud was an inside job. The dog was too good. Nobody just \u003cem\u003eplays basketball like that\u003c\/em\u003e. We're not saying it was a government program, but we're not \u003cem\u003enot\u003c\/em\u003e saying that either. Do your research. Connect the strings.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWeatherproof, UV-resistant, and dishwasher-safe — because the truth needs to survive the elements. 6.66% of every order is donated to The Satanic Temple. No AI was used in the creation of this design. All designs are hand-printed and made to order in Denver, Colorado.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Gas Station Sushi","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":41704894627973,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0603\/0121\/3829\/files\/airbudwasaninsidejob.png?v=1781331213"},{"product_id":"i-got-my-ass-ate-at-disney-world","title":"I Got My Ass Ate at Disney World","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe happiest place on Earth. You paid $200 for a churro and stood in line for three hours and somehow it was still worth it. No regrets. You know what you did and you'd do it again.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWeatherproof, UV-resistant, and dishwasher-safe — built to outlast the memory and the shame. Features a Paw Patrol logo stolen from the internet and deployed without remorse, as God intended. 6.66% of every order is donated to The Satanic Temple. No AI was used in the creation of this design. All designs are hand-printed and made to order in Denver, Colorado.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Gas Station Sushi","offers":[{"title":"Bumper Sticker","offer_id":41704894988421,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Die-Cut","offer_id":41704895021189,"sku":null,"price":5.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0603\/0121\/3829\/files\/Igotmyassateatdisneyworld.png?v=1781331341"},{"product_id":"gender-i-hardly-know-er","title":"Gender? I Hardly Know 'Er","description":"\u003cp\u003eA timeless question, posed elegantly, answered immediately. Gender? Never met her. Don't know her. Couldn't pick her out of a lineup. The classical portrait says this is a matter of great philosophical weight. The pink script says we're absolutely not taking it seriously. Both are correct.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWeatherproof, UV-resistant, and dishwasher-safe — because your identity crisis deserves to survive a car wash. 6.66% of every order is donated to The Satanic Temple. No AI was used in the creation of this design. All designs are hand-printed and made to order in Denver, Colorado.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Gas Station Sushi","offers":[{"title":"Bumper Sticker","offer_id":41705166372997,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Die-Cut","offer_id":41705166405765,"sku":null,"price":5.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0603\/0121\/3829\/files\/genderIhardlyknower.png?v=1781332390"},{"product_id":"gender-en-esta-economia","title":"Gender? ¿En esta economía?","description":"\u003cp\u003eYou've got rent due, groceries up 40%, and someone out here wants to talk about gender. With respect: ¿en esta economía? The vintage illustration agrees — she's dressed as a flower and she doesn't have time for this either. A bilingual statement for the chronically overwhelmed and delightfully unclassifiable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWeatherproof, UV-resistant, and dishwasher-safe — because your existential crisis deserves to survive a car wash. 6.66% of every order is donated to The Satanic Temple. No AI was used in the creation of this design. All designs are hand-printed and made to order in Denver, Colorado.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Gas Station Sushi","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":41704901312645,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0603\/0121\/3829\/files\/genderinthiseconomy.png?v=1781333230"},{"product_id":"i-saw-my-first-dead-body-at-six-flags-over-texas","title":"I Saw My First Dead Body at Six Flags Over Texas","description":"\u003cp\u003eA formative experience. A life-changing moment. A Tuesday at Six Flags Over Texas. 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Probably.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Gas Station Sushi","offers":[{"title":"Bumper Sticker","offer_id":41705166635141,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Die-Cut","offer_id":41705166667909,"sku":null,"price":5.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0603\/0121\/3829\/files\/I_saw_my_first_dead_body_at_six_flags.png?v=1781393112"}],"url":"https:\/\/gasstationsushi.ink\/collections\/bumper-stickers-2.oembed","provider":"Gas Station Sushi","version":"1.0","type":"link"}